The Grey: Of Wolf and Man

For the most part there is a significant difference between man and beast, and even in its most primal moments Joe Carnahan's The Grey never lets us forget that. Half of this film is every bit the intense and tough as nails survivalist thriller I expected it to be, but the big surprise comes in the quieter moments of self reflection. These characters are placed in a predicament so bleak and dire they are forced back to the meaning of... life.

Ottway (Liam Neeson) is catching a flight out of an Alaskan oil rigging town when the plane spectacularly crashes in the middle of the frozen wilderness. After locating another half dozen survivors these men quickly discover that the harsh weather and lack of food isn't going to be the only thing they have to worry about. It seems they have inadvertently intruded on territory that is dangerously close to a den of wolves. These creatures kill without fear once their land has been threatened by outsiders. We learn all of this quite useful information from Ottway whose job it is to hunt these creatures for the oil company. It quickly becomes as obvious to us as it does to him that the hunter has now become the hunted.

As I have already stated if you have come here for action packed thrills you won't leave disappointed. You should be warned however that there is a psychological element at play as well as a great deal of hopelessness and despair to be found here. Not all characters fall victim to fangs and claws since the elements take their toll too. As the numbers start to dwindle some of the characters test their faith while others just give up as we begin to wonder who, if anyone is going to make it out alive. There is a kind of reckless bravery at work here that I quite admired, but I am willing to guess that most people will be put off by it. I expect the amount of groans in a packed house to be near deafening when the film hits the end credits.

I would have loved to have compared this film to Alive, but one of the film's characters saved me the trouble. This is the gritty, cold, and steely kind of Carnahan that hasn't been seen since his equally depressing and intense cop drama Narc. Survival films like The Grey are all very similar on the surface, but this one runs ahead of the pack for its darker and much more philosophical content. B+

The Tracks Of My Tears

Fresh out of seeing a double feature pair of Oscar nominated weepies War Horse and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close I have two words for you: Bring tissues... For your girlfriend, naturally. I mean I am a man, and wouldn't be caught dead admitting to you that any movie would possess enough power to make my eyeballs rain. Unless of course we are talking about an animated elephant being gently caressed and rocked to sleep by his incarcerated mother, or upon the moment of revelation when the oafish and annoying klutz finally admits to the straight-laced cynic that his wife passed away years ago and that he is currently homeless, or even... Christ, I guess that I really am something of a softy.

War Horse: I honestly thought this one stalled terribly out the gate. We witness the horse through its birth, frolic as a young stallion, and then it is sold at an auction to a farmer who clearly can't afford him. Then saving the farm rests on the shoulders of the animal as he is needed to plow the field... Blah Blah Blah. The first act stretches out forever. Luckily the film then hits its stride when World War I begins. The horse acquires a new owner nearly every fifteen minuets as it shuffles between children, the elderly, and soldiers both British and German, refusing to depict one side being more ruthless than the other. A truly heartfelt scene involves the horse being stuck in a barbed wire fence in the middle of no mans land and one member from both sides calling a truce in order to work together to free the magnificent beast. The closing moments come complete with a gorgeous fire red and orange lit skyline, and sure do a wonderful job of stirring up memories of classics like The Searchers and Gone With The Wind. That. Horse. Had. Moxie. Indeed. B

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close: I think I was surprised as anyone when it was discovered that the academy actually bit the hook on this piece of Oscar-bait. I don't think I can recall a film with this much award winning star power, sentimentality, sadness, and a seemingly impossible quest by an overly ambitious child since Pay it Forward. Fortunately for the viewer this film isn't nearly as dreadful as that one. While it's true that events revolve around the tragic events of 9/11. I felt this film did its best to remind the viewer on the impact of loss without overdoing it too much. Chunks are quite effective. This massive quest might end on a mildly disappointing note but at least the film is honest about it, and quick to remind us which is worse: a disappointing conclusion, or nothing? Hanks is fine in his all too brief role, Thomas Horn is quite odd as the ingenious child trying to make sense of things that just can't be explained. Max Von Sydow delivers a memorable performance as a mute stranger that unsuccessfully attempts to hide a pretty obvious secret. But it is Sandra Bullock who emerges here in her final moments as the film's true unsung hero (something I never thought I would be able to admit). I fell roughly in the middle with this one as well. It is sappy and heartfelt enough for mainstream audiences to work, but I wanted more edge. Too soon? Perhaps. B-

Haywire: Hit Me With Its Best Shot

I must say that I am quite enjoying this emergence of arty action flicks of late. Both Drive and Hanna ended up on my 'Best of' list last year, and Steven Sodenbergh's Haywire earns a place right alongside them.

This is one hell of a classy thriller that has tons of style, and sure knows how to scrap. Gina Carano is a true find. With this role she can turn on the charm one moment and then tussle with the big boys (Channing Tatum, Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor) the next. The fact that she is incredibly attractive certainly doesn't hurt either.

Speaking of the fight scenes... This one manages to get it right where so many others have failed. The camera stays still, no shaking, no quick cuts, no pumped up music, in fact these scenes are totally silent until a thrown punch manages to connect and the sound of impact is brutally realistic. Most of these fights even manage to pop up and surprise the viewer when you least expect them to.

I enjoyed this film on about the same level as I enjoyed Soderbergh's The Limey. Another film that is incredibly slick, feels familiar without being identical to any number of action films, and is able to tell its entire disjointed revenge tale in about 90 minutes. You'll go in expecting one film and come out feeling you've seen something else, something better than it should have been. A-

Carnage: A Massacre of Manners

Some try to be civil, even to people they may despise. There is a certain unspoken rule of hospitably when you invite guests into your home wether they be wanted or unwanted. Make them feel comfortable, offer them a drink (or in this case some cobbler), and try to work out your diffrences. What happens though when four characters each with their own stubborn agenda and opinions meet one afternoon, and no one becomes willing to back down?

The answer to that question may or may not be found in Roman Polanski's Carnage. A film that at first shows the masks of false kindness and deceit we wear when confronting strangers in an uncomfortable situation, but then wisely over time lets the characters take them off (along with their gloves) for truly mean spirited dialogue, and thus reveals to the audience the just how monstrous these people really are.

Penelope and Michael Longstreet (Jodie Foster and John C. Reilly) have invited Nancy and Alan Cowan (Kate Winslet and Christoph Waltz) over to their apartment in order to discuss a incident involving their children. An altercation between the kids that resulted in the Longstreet's son getting whacked in the face with a stick and suffering two permanently damaged teeth. After five minutes it would seem a compromise has been met by both parties about the event and the Cowan's are heading for the door. Not so fast. Penelope, who you can already tell has her claws out even as she smiles, is not entirely satisfied with the outcome and requests and apology to her son from the Cowan's son. The Cowan's agree, but feel the only way their son will apologize is if he is forced to... In Penelope's eyes that's not good enough.

From here the couples begin to talk about their children, how differently they are raised, truths are revealed, and we are left to decide. But that is hardly the whole picture. Throughout the afternoon outside topics are brought to the table as well. Things thought to be simple conversation pieces, but are later used as targets of humiliation. Things like art, occupation, and even Nancy's upchuck reflex. Then midway through when both parties decide they are getting nowhere, they decide to get mean.

Each of the performances are pretty fascinating. Foster appears to wear her hostility on her sleeve, she is very snippy and spiteful throughout the entire picture. Waltz is her complete opposite, he is so blase and nonchalant about this event that he comes off as more than a little arrogant, especially when he kills the conversation nearly every five minuets to answer his cell phone that never ceases to stop ringing. I recently heard Charlize Theron say in an interview for her role in Young Adult that the trick to playing a drunk character is to attempt to act sober when you are in fact intoxicated. Winslet should have taken this advice for the second half of the film because once the booze comes out I didn't believe she was drunk, just merely acting like she was. Reilly is the true wolf in sheep's clothing here, in the first half he appears to be the most sane and sensible of the bunch, but later reveals this 'nice guy' approach was complete and utter bullshit.

I was reasonably surprised and entertained the way Polanski kept me intrested considering the entire film is essentially like being trapped in a room with four despicable human beings. The film moves at a very brisk pace as alliances are made then quickly broken, wives turn on their husbands and vice versa, then the film decides to just abruptly end without the slightest hint of resolution. In its own little upper-middle class Fight Club way: "When it was over, nothing was solved, but nothing really mattered." B+

Terri (DVD)

Terri tells the story of an obese high school outcast who one day decides and continues to wear pajamas to class simply because they are comfortable. Throughout the course of the film Terri (Jacob Wysocki) befriends not only the assistant principle (John C. Reilly) who really seems to care, but also Heather (Olivia Crocicchia) a seemingly popular classmate who becomes socially neglected after getting caught participating in a sexual act in the middle of class. Make no mistake this film is as bizarre as it is heartfelt, but above all it is honest and feels real. Reilly has had an impressive span of roles, and here he gives one of his finest performances yet. A must see for anyone who took shrapnel in the war we call high school. A-

I am no longer interested in who killed Rosie Larsen...

. . . but if you are, you're going to have to watch ALL of season two of The Killing, according to Vulture.

I guess at one point AMC promised that her killer would be revealed in the first couple episodes and then the series would transition to another case. But why would they do that when they can string along their remaining viewers for another season? So good luck making it through another three months of constant rain, bad sound editing, dumb subplots, and people staring through kitchen windows.  

GHOST PROTOCOL, DRAGON TATTOO, and YOUNG ADULT

Some of my recent micro-reviews from Twitter, FWIW:

MI: GHOST PROTOCOL (2011): Murphy's law reigns, yet bumbling improvisation wins out. Satisfying action, but Bird's debut nothing special. ★★

GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO (2011): Mara is an equal to Rapace. Fincher's is better than original, but still felt unnecessary. ★★★

YOUNG ADULT (2011): a clever meditation on relation of self-image to one's geography, popularity, career, sexuality. Theron's amazing. ★★★★

Nothing thrilling, I know, but these are just some quick hit gut reactions that require little elaboration. My brain is just not as long-winded as it used to be.

Ridley is Such a Tease

Come on, Ridley Scott! You can't keep saying that your new film Prometheus won't contain the actual creature in it, and then deliver a teaser trailer as spellbinding as this! This is pure Alien, down to the minute details. So, why is this currently my pick for most anticipated movie of next year (after Django Unchained, of course)? Because I feel like I am going to have seen The Dark Knight Rises before I actually get a chance to see it.

American Horror Story (Season 1)

MAJOR SPOILERS!

My fascination with FX's American Horror Story is not unlike that of the career of Lady Gaga. At first I was pretty put off by the freaky/bizarre nature, but quickly realized that there wasn't anything else like it out there. It soon became a fascinating and addictive obsession. Both can now officially be placed with a capital 'G' under the category of Guilty Pleasure, and I am beyond positive that both have got a pair of balls.

AHS was my absolute favorite new show of the season... let me count the ways:

• The opening credit sequence: Week after week this shudder inducing yet super cool through its retro photos of small children, mason jars full of unknown oddities, and creepy yet infectiously catchy score is so well made it deserves comparison to both the openings of Se7en and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

• Jessica 'F**king' Lang: I don't care what awards this woman does or doesn't get nominated for this year Golden Globe, Emmy, Nobel Peace Prize... Give em to her! Oh Yeah!... She is that good! She plays a southern belle with daggers in her smile that can turn on a dime to perfection.

• The mingling of fact and fiction: One of the more intriguing episodes involved the incorporation of the infamous Black Dahlia crime into the history of the accurately dubbed 'murder house' in fact most of the flashbacks seemed to hold an eerie resemblance to some true crimes making the show all the more unsettling.

• Unflinching content: The recreation of the school shooting alone earns this mark, but we also have characters getting burned alive, shot, axed, poisoned, tons of gay-bashing, a pregnant mistress gets bludgeoned with a shovel only to be buried under a gazebo, a maid that appears as a young lust-filled vixen to some and a elderly dead-eyed hag to others. The sex, violence, language, and terror are pushed to the absolute limit for a basic cable program.

• The Revelations: When it was revealed 3/4 of the way through this season that a majority of the characters (including daughter Violet) were already dead I knew this show wasn't going to screw around and stretch things out. Sure enough a few episodes later the two leads Connie Britton & Dylan McDermott also met there respectful demise ingeniously giving this show the freedom to start from scratch next season.

Half of me has a hard time believing that something this great could have been given to us by Ryan Murphy the creator of the truly awful Glee, yet on the other hand this is the soapiest show to have me hooked since his previous FX contribution Nip/Tuck. I am very intrigued to find out where, not to mention who, will be getting haunted in season 2. A

Reasons to see OUR IDIOT BROTHER

1. Paul Rudd is at his most affable. And that's saying a lot, considering he's affable in every role. The man seeps affability from his pores. And here he's affable AND stupid, which like trebles the likability quotient.

2. You will see Zooey Deschanel** and Rashida Jones*** make out.*

3. You will see Steve Coogan's balls.*****

4. If you like Elizabeth Banks, but wished she could be more Parker Posey-ish, you'll be a happy camper.

5. Emily Mortimer's patented whiny American accent. See also Lars and the Real Girl.

6. Everything gets wrapped up in a nice little bow for you.*******

* You know, if that kind of thing is your bag. It's not especially sexy, but hey, everyone loves those girls, so, who knows.

** I'd be lying if I said that, before watching this film, I didn't go through a deliberate calculation of whether the power of Paul Rudd's likability was enough to counterbalance my distaste for Zooey. Zooey was her normal dead-behind-the-eyes self, but far less irritable than usual.

*** Rashida Jones was great, and reminded me of Toni Colette's "Buck" personality from The United States of Tara.****

**** Not because she played a lesbian, but because of the oversized glasses.

***** Incidentally, why can't Steve Coogan ever get funny roles in American movies? The man's a genius, but they keep casting him as "The Generic British Asshole" (except for Hamlet II, of course).

*******A truly strange conclusion, in which everything that Paul Rudd's character does wrong is summarily forgotten, and we see a montage of his sisters fixing their lives using honesty and self-respect they learned from their idiot brother. Even I, low brow as I am, would have enjoyed a little tiny bit of realistic ambiguity.

Hugo: Movie Magic

I am so in love with Martin Scorsese's love letter to the early days of cinema. Hugo is a film of limitless ambition and sense of wonder. I can't begin to tell you how pleased I was to see that the pair of seven year olds I took to see this picture were every bit as enchanted by it as I was.

At first glance I didn't expect much out of this one. From what little I actually knew about it before going in I expected the bulk of it to consist of Borat chasing a couple of kids around a train station for 2+ hours. Now while that is part of the film it is a mere fraction of the entire tale. My fears were laid to rest during the sweepingly beautiful and epic pre-title sequence as the camera glides through a post WWI Paris and depicts a typical day in the life of orphan/mechanical genius Hugo Cabret.

Hugo is attempting to rebuild a severely damaged automaton discovered by his father (Jude Law) who was tragically killed in a fire mid-rebuild. Living behind the walls of the massive train station Hugo spends his day repairing the station's clocks and snatching food from vendors and miniature parts from a wind-up toy shop owned by Ben Kingsley, who may have a bigger part in the mystery behind the automation than Hugo realizes.

Scorsese really gets as much out of his actors as he puts into the film. Asa Butterfield plays the title role as a very sympathetic yet determined child that possesses some serious blue eyes. Chloe Mortez continues to prove that she is going to be a big, big star as Isabelle, a fellow orphan who is all too happy to help Hugo solve this mystery. I read somewhere that Sacha Baron Cohen has been dubbed this generation's Peter Sellers, and after seeing him as the bumbling station guard here, that is an extremely hard theory to disprove. Ben Kingsley invokes (at first) fear for being such a bitter curmudgeon, but then your feeling shift when it is discovered how and why he gave up his life's purpose.

The heart of this film really involves capturing the magic of dreams on film. Scenes from classics such as A Trip to the Moon and Safety Last are interwoven into this feature, and thus reignite the wonder and imagination that comes with the territory. I was kind of reassured watching this tale that there will always be a passion for film, and that even as the times, effects, and techniques will adapt... movies are so beloved that they aren't going anywhere anytime soon. This is quite possibly the finest Sunday matinee I've attended. A

Note: Not just in this, but several films I have notice there is one thing that should be included in nearly every 3D feature in order to make it truly effective: Snowflakes.

'Ghost' Busted My Eardrums

How does Ghost Protocol differ from previous installments of the Mission Impossible series? In short: The plot is much more minimal (stop an anarchist from setting off nuclear war), the explosions bigger and more surprising not to mention near ear-shattering, and the action this time around is almost brutally intense. There are half a dozen hits in this movie that left me wincing in pain.

I don't believe that this is going to change action films forever, but it slides in quite nicely amongst the already other well established spy series (i.e. Bond, Bourne). Some other notes worth mentioning: I found Simon Pegg incredibly annoying here, and that's unfortunate considering I generally like the guy. Jeremy Renner continues his streak of badass as a bookworm with hidden field training. I found it kind of funny that the secret he is hiding from the team is not only cliched, but is also rendered pointless by the film's ending.

Bottom line: This is a film that should be seen not for the story, but for the spectacle. Seeing this in IMAX ensured the sights and sounds would rattle me to the core. This is a mission you should choose to accept, so long as you're not terrified of heights. B+

Nothing to Be Ashamed About: Shame

Shame is one of those movies that doesn't really tell a story, but is more a voyeuristic snapshot of somebody's life. In Shame, it is the life of Brandon (Michael Fassbender), a sex-addict living in present day Manhattan. Brandon lives in a sterile world of modern office buildings and condos. He is professionally successful and good looking (aka "impressive" full frontal). Brandon is really a victim though: of his past; his surroundings; his condition. Fassbender does an amazing job because as "shameful" as his character is, he plays the role so well that he is somehow tragic and likeable at the same time. All this despite the fact that Brandon, on a nightly basis, has sex with different women -- both casually and by paying; watches disgusting (as described by his own friend) online porn at home and at work; and masturbates at home and at work several times a day. He is driven by an insatiable need for sex, but it can only be anonymous sex. At one point, he seduces a nice girl, but is incapable of performing with someone that is not a hooker or a stranger. His pain really comes through in that scene.

Carey Mulligan plays Brandon's sister, Sissy. Although many have said this was the year of Ryan Gosling, I really think this was Mulligan's year and Shame is her best, most challenging performance yet. Sissy is also seriously messed up, living in pain like Brandon, but her suffering is collateral to Brandon's in the movie. For example, one of the best scenes in the movie is an extended, uncut shot of Brandon running through the streets of Manhattan in the middle of the night. The reason he ran: Sissy was being self-destructive, but we only see it through Brandon's eyes.

In another memorable scene, we get a peek into Sissy's (and Brandon's) pain through Sissy's rendition of the song "New York, New York." I have always associated this song with youth, ambition and the excitement of NYC. Not here; as sung by Mulligan -- in an extended close up -- it is an incredibly sad song because, for some people, it is also a song about dreams that will never come true. Sissy and Brandon are some of those people, and they are both painfully aware of that.

In the end, there is no "event" that changes anything in Shame. We are left to wonder why our characters are so damaged and what is to come. This is a good movie about life and, as with life, you choose what to make of it. Worth noting: NC-17 rating for good reason. A

The Descendants & Payne's Obsession With Uncomfortable Kissing

The award season hype machine has been burning overtime for this one, and George Clooney really is as good as most say he is here. Yet I wasn't exactly blown away this time around.

The Descendants tells the story of Matt King, a man who must face several difficult choices. Matt's wife was recently left comatose after a speedboat accident, and upon discovering her infidelity he must decide whether or not to inform her lover. Most of the film in fact revolves around the quest to find the other man in which Clooney's seventeen year old daughter is almost (unreasonably) excited to participate in. Meanwhile Matt is also on the verge of closing a deal that would secure him millions by selling inherited Hawaiian land. Do you think Matt will find a way to forgive his unfaithful spouse before letting her go? Will he be able to live with himself for selling the untouched land that was passed down to him by his ancestors? What do you think? I thought the conflict was intriguing, but the resolutions came too easy.

There is one major connection between this film and his other projects that almost grabbed me out of nowhere and violently pressed its lips against mine... Director Alexander Payne seems to delight in including at least one awkward make-out session in each of his films. The ill-advised mood killer between Miles and Maya in Sideways. The hasty smooch between Warren Schmidt and a compassionate, but not that compassionate stranger in About Schmidt. Here it involves a short lip lock between Clooney and his soon to be widow's lover's wife (played by the amazing supporting scene stealer Judy Greer). Their quick kiss reveals volumes to her without saying a word.

This is still a fine film, but when compared to previous works by Payne I found it a tad bit light on both the laughs and the melodrama, the two things that he has become expert in blending. This is the kind of film I would have no problem pecking on the cheek, but no tongue. B

A Myriad Masterpiece

You mean to tell me that Heathers is now available to watch instantly on Netflix? Well, "Fuck me gently with a Chainsaw!" This black as night comedy/teen angst/social satire/endlessly quotable/ late 80's gem is just too cool for school. It's Bonnie and Clyde between physics class, Mean Girls with a body count, proof that they just don't make em like they used to, and probably shouldn't. If you have never seen it I would have to wonder if you had a brain tumor for breakfast! Do yourself a favor: grab a bag of Corn Nuts, and a big glass of blue liquid drain cleaner to wash it down with, and revisit this world full of Swatch dogs and Diet Coke heads.

'Walking Dead' is Dragging its Feet

SPOILERS!!!

Last night's mid-season finale of The Walking Dead was entitled 'Pretty Much Dead Already', but to me an even more appropriate title might have been 'Too Little Too Late.'

Lately I have been confessing my dissatisfaction with this shows more than obvious sophomore slump, and I was reassured by several fellow viewers that this episode was going to bring me back from the brink. I must say that the final ten minutes were powerful and well executed, but when all was said and done the first words out of my mouth weren't "Holy Shit!", they were "It's about goddamn time!" quickly followed by "Is that all!?"

I was more than glad to see the missing Sophia story line FINALLY reach its conclusion, and the way it was resolved was about as satisfying as possible, but was I surprised by it? Absolutely not! You know what would have blown me to the back of the room? Dale pulling the trigger while Shane was in mid-speech, or Rick unleashing his captured walker and letting it bite Shane. That's what I would consider a cliffhanger. Having someone in this group get bitten, and then debate how long to give em before they needed to be taken care of.

To me this season has already taken so long to get to reach a conclusion that you could have based on a coin flip. I was even more disheartened when I saw the promo for the show's return to find out they are still at the barn. Why can't they keep moving? In the first season they stayed at that lab for a single episode as opposed to stretching that out. What started out as strong has quickly grown into tedious. Much like after finding out what was in the hatch on that mysterious island I'm still not sure wether or not I will keep watching.

The Skin I Live In (La Piel Que Habito)

Sick. Twisted. Brilliant. That pretty much sums up Almodovar's "The Skin I Live In."

I am going to avoid discussing the plot altogether because any synopsis would take away from the experience of watching the movie itself. There are significant plot twists throughout and as usual Almodovar does not give them to us in a simple sequential fashion. The plot is developed in bits and pieces and by different sources with different prejudices; just as we are exposed to information in real life -- sometimes after the fact, sometimes before we realize its significance.

I am itching to discuss further with anyone who has seen the movie, but my view was that this is Almodovar returning to his roots: violence, gore, sex, and, of course, a beautiful ode to women -- but with a mature twist. Today, I am thankful for this great movie. A++++++++

Happy Turkey (or Tofurkey?) Day!

Long Distance Runaround

I finally managed to catch Going the Distance early this morning on HBO, and I expected a harmless little time waster. Instead I got something pretty damn amazing. After taking notes in my head I have compiled a list of things I could either relate to or admired about this one:

• A budding relationship
• Facial hair jokes
• Top Gun
  
• The shitty job market
• Gaffigan!!!
• An overly obvious yet recognizable soundtrack
• Centipede
• A confession of love to Drew Barrymore in front of a large crowd (which apparently is a requirement in every frigging movie she stars in: Fever Pitch, Never Been Kissed, Music and Lyrics, The Wedding Singer... etc.)
  

I'm sure there are several others. Bottom line: This is a terrific date flick that is funny, filthy, romantic, hilarious, and honest. No easy feat, but since when were long distance relationships supposed to be? A-

How I Met Your 'Muppets'

Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller's rebirth of of Jim Henson's The Muppets is a cause for celebration. Here is a charmer that is so warm and festive with its colorful settings and downright jovial musical numbers that I can honestly say no other film I've seen this year has put me in a better mood, and I am not even a fan. (Confession: This is my very first muppet experience.)

UNFORTUNATELY... I am unable to give a full review at this time because I only got to screen roughly the first half of this film. Based on what I have seen, and how pleasantly surprised I was I felt compelled to share the experience. I am now fully determined to see the rest.

Based on what I did see I can tell you the plot involves a pair of lifelong muppet fans and brothers Gary (Segal) and Walter (a muppet). While on a trip to Hollywood and a visit to the dilapidated and abandoned muppet theater Walter overhears the plans of an oil tycoon (Chris Cooper) who plans to drill on their land unless they are able to raise ten million dollars. This results in a good ol' fashoned 'Lets get the band back together and put on a show!' very much in the vein of The Blues Brothers.

The right call was made with this cast. Jason Segel jumps into this like a kid in a candy store. Amy Adams (cuter than any of these fuzzy fictitious creatures) is as sweet and lovable as always as Segel's supportive longtime girlfriend. Even typical sourpuss Chris Cooper shines here. Although he is the face of the film's antagonist, there is a gentle kind of warmth to his villainy. I couldn't help but chuckle at his decision to repeat the phrase 'maniacal laugh' when revealing his plan as opposed to just actually doing it.

Anyone who saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall I'm sure is already well aware that this is something of a dream project for Segel and Stoller, and they have taken perfectly executed steps to satisfy both devotees and newcomers with a kind of childish innocence that I still managed to find incredibly humorous. I hope to have as much of a rainbow connection with the second half of this film as I did with the first. Update to come.

Why won't they let us just us volunteer to save our favorite shows? RT if you agree!

Upon hearing news that NBC was temporarily "benching" Community for its midseason schedule (and witnessing the furious anger that erupted on Twitter immediately afterwards), I was reminded that television networks not only don't know how to market their best shows, but have no idea how to motivate a loyal core audience.

Think about it: fans of Community, much like those of Arrested Development, are highly engaged, invested, intelligent consumers of entertainment (i.e. "nerds"). They must be worth like at least 10 times a casual, couch potato viewer, right? What if the network explicitly came out and said, "hey, we're going to cancel this show that a tiny, niche audience loves THAT IS OF COURSE UNLESS said audience is willing to volunteer to make the show extra money by exposing themselves to say, 10 minutes of extra advertising a week."

Wouldn't we fans do that? It could be done so many ways: just watching ads, answering marketing questions, clicking on a couple flash ads. But no one has ever tried that! What if AMC threatened to do the UNTHINKABLE and cancel Breaking Bad or Mad Men -- wouldn't people come out of the woodwork and drop a tiny portion of their personal time to make sure their favorite diversion survives?

Give us a chance, NBC. Think outside of the box.

It's The End Of The World As We Know It (and I Feel...)

Lars von Trier doesn't make films, he makes endurance tests. Anyone who has ever stepped up to his previous challenges like Dogville or Antichrist would have to agree that he enjoys putting an audience through the ringer with his patience testing run times, and his incredibly bleak subject matter. If memory serves correct I believe he is the only director whose films require breaks on my part in order to finish them. His latest film Melancholia is a gorgeous yet devastating two part tale of impending doom. The first half involves a marriage that will fail before it even begins, and the second involves the failure of all existence.

The film opens during a lavish wedding reception for Justine (Kirsten Dunst) and Michael (Alexander Skarsgard) they both appear to be very happy and even glowing as they try to help their flustered limo driver attempt to get their lengthy ride past some sharp turns. When they finally arrive two hours late there is already a certain amount of uncomfortable apprehension in the air, and it has nothing to do with the new red star Justine notices in the night sky. It would appear Justine has already gotten cold feet quicker than Kim Kardashian after taking the plunge.

As the recent attendee of a best friends wedding I must say that a great deal of the sights, sounds, and ceremony felt shockingly familiar. However Justine makes some bizarre decisions during her reception, like where to use the restroom, taking a bath before cutting the cake, and then screwing some random guy in the sand-trap of a golf course... on her wedding night! Needless to say it doesn't quite work out. The worst thing we did was give our DJ what can only be described as something in the vein of alcohol poisoning, and then taking over his turn table. (One of the best parties ever IMO).

Weeks pass and Justine has become something of a hollow shell. She is currently staying with her sister Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg) and her husband John (Kiefer Sutherland) who are having a tough time agreeing on the nature of that red star first noticed during the wedding party. It turns out that this wasn't a star at all but a massive new planet making its way around the earth's orbit named Melancholia. Claire is terrified the planet is on a collision course. John is convinced it will simply pass us by.

There is a power this film possesses that allows me to bypass its jumbled narrative. It seriously makes one stop and ponder how you would feel if annihilation was inescapable. Then if it wasn't deep enough already it may cause you to look further into yourself and realize that von Trier didn't really need a rogue planet to get his message across. The clock WILL run out. What matters is how you decide to face it. To say that the answers come to us easy in Melancholia is more than a bit of an understatement. Much like The Tree of Life it will challenge, entrance, and even madden. B+

Romantico

This short look into the life of a Mariachi working in San Francisco to support his family in Mexico will leave you glad that you’re not a Mariachi working in San Francisco to support your family in Mexico. Nevertheless, it’s a great -- and efficient -- film that kept my interest throughout. I appreciated that the filmmakers traveled to Mexico to give us a peek into his family life. In the end, it left me with questions ranging from why a country with such an abundance of labor can't build a functioning economy, to questions about the root of our most basic desires and motivations. It’s heartbreaking to compare his life to the lyrics of his songs. Grade – A


Bonus review: The reason for my hiatus was that all of my Netflix instant-viewing time was spent re-watching Mad Men. Grade - A

A Few Seconds on "In Time"

Intriguing premise. Flimsy sci-fi. Pretty faces. Thoroughly entertaining.

In this films vision of the future it would roughly cost a person nearly 120 dollars just to watch this movie. I think that full price in our present might be asking a bit too much. However five bucks and two hours of your life would be money... and time well spent. B

A Quick Note on PA3

Something has been bothering me since I screened Paranormal Activity 3 on Thursday. I don't need to give a full review of the film other than to say that this gimmick has become every bit as tedious and boring as it could be, but there is one thing about this film that deserves special mention. This official trailer for the film appears to be promoting a film consisting entirely of deleted scenes. The balcony jump, the psychiatrist character, the water throw, the mirror knock, the burning house, mother getting tossed onto the bed by an unseen entity. Not one, not a SINGLE one of these money shots appear in the actual film. I can't tell if this is insanity or genius. On one hand all these non-existent scare moments leave the film nearly devoid of some potentially intense action. On the contrary, the two or three good scares this film does contain haven't been spoiled by the time you actually see the film. It still feels like false advertising to me. Save yourself the ten bucks and click on the link even if it advertises a completely different film.

Why The Thing Sucks

I'm going to have to disagree with Allen on this one. I thought this movie sucked. I had my hopes up way too high, but I was willing to settle for something in the middle. I didn't even get that.

The cast was all right, grounded by Joel Edgerton and Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who I hope got a big pay day. There were a lot of bearded creeps who didn't have to act sinister to be sinister, which is good when there is the possibility that they are aliens. The film is supposed to be set in 1982, but didn't look or feel like it took place in the same world as the first film. Their breath looked like it was digitally added in places, which ruined the atmosphere for me. These are little things.

The big things: The film lacks the curiosity that the 1982 film had for the creature. Admittedly, it was a bad idea to do a prequel or a remake to a film that told its story so completely and effectively in the first place, but they could have at least slowed down the scientific portion of the film and made the scientists authentically curious. Of course, this would have been boring to me because they would have been recycling material from the earlier film.

The film lacks the "which one of us is human and which of us is the Thing" paranoia and suspense that the 1982 film so deliciously sustains. There is one scene where we are paranoid, and it is the only scene in the film that works. It is the scene where Winstead realizes that the alien cannot replicate fillings in teeth. (This is the "brilliant" twist the writers came up with to avoid having the characters repeat the blood testing segment from the earlier film.) This scene gets Winstead right up in everyone's grill - close to potential Things, who could reach out and grab her with a thousand slimy tentacles. The rest of the film is too busy rushing to the next action scene. The entire film is too hurried, whereas the earlier film was more languidly paced, which matched the cold, tiring atmosphere of Antarctica.

There is no insight into how the alien operates. Would multiple Things be aware that they are both Things? Would they be able to communicate with each other? Since the movie is bad, it could have at least answered these questions that don't really need asked or answered. There is one scene where a severed hand breaks apart into two separate Things, and then reforms into one. I guess that answers the question.

The film recycles several segments directly from the earlier film. There's the autopsy scene. The scene where the radio doesn't work. The scene where suspicious members of the group are locked in a shed out in the cold, and found later to have escaped. The scene where members are thought to be Things because how else would they have survived a harsh snow storm? The scene where a Thing attacks in the wreck room and a flame thrower malfunctions, then the Thing catches on fire and bursts through the wall and falls dead in the snow. I ticked them off one by one as the film progressed.

The closing act, which takes place on the alien's spaceship, is without originality or suspense. The ship is stupid, the alien looks like left over stir fry, the author's attempts at presenting what I imagine was supposed to be an alien communication screen just looks like unfinished CGI, and the final Thing doesn't come close to the Blair monster at the climax of the 1982 film, which towered over Kurt Russell and was legitimately intimidating.

There is no ambiguity in the ending. The 1982 film left you with questions. This film ends with the beginning of the 1982 film, which is actually cheap considering that in order to do so, it had to abandon three characters at the base in order to get us to the spaceship. And it never explains where the fucking dog came from or how they knew the dog was a Thing. Just comes out of nowhere.

The worst thing about the film are the special effects. Can we conclude that CGI does not compare to model, puppet and miniature creature effects just as CGI does not compare to make-up and gore effects? The 1982 The Thing is one of the definitive gross out horror films. There are sights in the film that you will only see there. Weird shit, like crab legs and spider legs coming out of a dog, and eyeballs on stalks, and chest cavities turning into gaping maws. Shit that will give your children nightmares. That kind of stuff is replicated here. This film has all sorts of grotesque imagery that comes close to outdoing the earlier film, but the thing is, it looks like a video game, whereas the first film used practical effects. All of that icky shit was modeled and covered in slime and fake blood. It had dimension and depth and detail. When bones snapped and skin tore and blood burst, it was legitimately vomit inducing. The stuff here is thin and cartoonish and unbelievable.

If you haven't seen the 1982 John Carpenter version, you're missing out on a unique horror experience. I agree with Allen on one thing - I hope this film brings light to the earlier version.

Bustin' Makes Me Feel Good

For years now I have always been a bit envious of my father telling me countless times about life before the internet and the term spoiler alert. About a time where seeing a blockbuster film on the big screen actually was an event. About the summer of 1984, and the moment the Stay Puft Marshmellow Man came looming around a skyscraper like a jovial King Kong, and about the packed house audience reaction of hilarity and shock to what they were witnessing. THIS is what going to the movies is all about, and for years I have wanted to experience that sensation for myself.

Last night my wish was finally granted as I was in attendance to one of the very limited screenings of Ivan Rietman's masterpiece Ghostbusters. This is it folks. This may very well be where my love for film originated. It is certainly the first film I can ever recall watching, and then re-watching when it aired every summer on ABC's Saturday night movie throughout the 80's. I loved it as a kid, and worship it as an adult. It is easy to see why the appeal is so great.

The film itself is a mixed bag of excellence. This sucker has got something for everyone. The element that still continues to stick out the most is the comedy. You would have to be insane to think this isn't one of the funniest films ever made. I could have written this review simply re-quoting an endless string of the film's one liners, but that would have been impossible to do without cracking up (My personal favorite: "...and the FLOWERS are still standing") Then there is the goofy sci-fi element and high tech jargon that make way for some of the most impressive special effects ever caught on film. Seriously, this movie still looks better and more convincing than most films made today. It even manages a few well earned scares without going overboard. It's enough to freak kids out without making them want to tear their glued eyeballs away. This is what I call a total package.

Then there are the performances. Is there anyone who can do sardonic better that Bill Murray? I'm just gonna come out and say it: The man has never been more in his element than he is here. Dan Aykroyd is sweet and earnest as he treats his new profession of trapping spirits with the up most respect, yet at times is almost child like when it comes to decision making especially during clutch time. Harold Ramis is the obvious brains of the group, and while you never catch him smirking his seriousness is what makes his character so humorous. And finally there is Ernie Hudson... the unsung Ghostbuster. Hired on as extra help I actually viewed him as the most relatable of the group, like an outsider learning to deal with myths revealed to be facts.

A few other observances during the showing:

• People literally Booed at the entrance of uber sleazeball villain Walter Peck (William Atherton).

• It was right around the delivery of the line of "I want you inside me" by Dana Barrett (Sigourney Weaver) in full gate-keeper/seductress mode that my date whispered to me: "I can't believe this movie is for kids!" She had a point. Ditto on the tons of cigarette smoking. God bless 80's flicks!

• Upon exiting the theatre I stopped in the lavatory, and as I approached the urinals one of my fellow moviegoers couldn't help but blurt out "Don't cross the streams!" Well played, sir.

The films newly remastered presentation deserves praise as well. Hearing that unlicensed nuclear accelerator power up in pure digital stereo sent more chills down my spine that the most fearsome ghost, and the picture quality is so clean you will want to heed the advice of not looking directly into the trap. In my opinion Ghostbusters is a true classic. A

Almost a Sure 'Thing'

1. Flame-throwers... check
2. Grotesque transformations... check
3. Paranoia... check
4. Isolated arctic setting... check
5. Semi-bleak conclusion... check

I'll be honest folks... I wasn't too disappointed with this new version of The Thing. John Carpenter's vision for this material will always remain the pinnacle, but this prequel of a remake is not without a few inspired moments of its own. Sure it may break the no girls allowed rule, but I happen to think that Mary Elizabeth Winstead is roughly about as adorable as Snake Plissken is a badass, so I'm willing to let that one slide. If anything I hope this new incarnation inspires people to check out the '82 version if only to learn what a perfect alien imitation truly looks like. B

Some Indie Films of Note

The Trip is a travelogue comedy starring British comedians Steve Coogan and Rob Brydo

n as themselves as they travel across Europe and eat sumptuous foods at expensive hotels while one-upping each other on their descriptions of the food, and doing various celebrity impersonations. Subplots involve Coogan realizing he leads an empty, loveless existence, and Brydon realizing he misses his wife and family.

The film is hilarious, if overlong (which is expected since it was originally a TV miniseries). It is immeasurably enjoyable to listen to Coogan and Brydon make fun of Michael Caine's cockney accent as it has developed over the years, then suddenly switch to Hugh Grant or Sean Connery.

It's worth checking out because it's

something different. It doesn't have much of a plot, just enough to get you through. It's basically a drawn out verbal duel between two gifted comedians, and is a laugh a minute from beginning to end. Give me this over your typical studio comedy any day.

Martha Marcy May Marlene has been getting a lot of press for Elizabeth Olsen's performance. Deservedly so. She switches gears from vulnerable and haunted to domineering and selfish at the flip of a coin, and is completely convincing. By the end of the film, we understand and sympathize with her character while at the same time understanding that she got herself into this mess.MMMM tells the story of Martha (played by Olsen, younger sister of the Olsen twins of yesteryear), one of those independent teens who was always running away from home and getting herself in over her head, and who has been gone for several years, enmeshed in one of those organic cults who live off the land except when they need money. Then they break into rich yuppie's houses while they're gone for the day and hock all their stuff.

This cult, called the Meyer Cult, is led by Patrick (played by John Hawkes), a thin, scruffy, yet sinister man who lulls them in with folks songs and speeches about technology run amuck and the financial infrastructure's imminent collapse. The Cult has the women doing the dishes, cooking and gardening and taking care of the babies, and the men get to eat first. And Patrick gets to fuck any of the girls if he wants to. It's another one of those John Hawkes performances, like his performance last year in Winter's Bone, where you don't understand how a hundred and forty pound man could be so frightening, yet here he is, and you shrink away from him.

The film is structured with the cult stuff as flashbacks, and the present day being Martha's uneasy reunion with her older, more stable sister, Lucy (played by Sarah Paulson), who is married to a successful British businessman named Ted (Hugh Dancy).

The film is a psychological thriller, and it really gets under your skin because, as you learn more about the cult, it begins to reveal how threatening and exacting they are, and you realize why Martha is acting like such a spook. There are scenes early on where she reacts to bumps in the night as if there were a war going on outside. Later, you understand why.

Olsen is intense. It's a difficult, complicated role, especially for a newer actress, but she pulls it off, and this should put her on the A-list. Hawkes continues to situate himself nicely in character actor territory. The film's only problem is that there is no conclusion. I literally thought the closing passage of the film was missing. It ends so ambiguously that it forgets to offer any closure for Martha. I understand they were trying to leave things up in the air. They still could have, and still allowed Martha to embrace how messed up she is, and allow that she must face a change.

Still, this is deft, powerful storytelling, and the director/writer, Sean Durkin, is skilled at filming entire scenes with a minimal amount of coverage, and in making the nature that is all around us as threatening as a knife.

Take Shelter is another of those paranoid thrillers where we're not sure until the very end if the character is bat shit crazy or if his rants and raves are prophecies of truth. In this case, we're introduced to Curtis (played by Michael Shannon), a construction worker who is just scraping by. He has a house and a wife and a kid. His wife is the lovely Samantha (played by Jessica Chastain), an understanding and down to earth woman who sells embroidery on the side for extra cash. Their daughter is maybe five years old, and is deaf. They live out in farm country, and there are no teachers for the deaf, so they will either have to home school her using sign language, or pay for a major operation to install listening devices so she can stay in a regular class room.

The twist comes when Curtis begins seeing great thundering storms in the sky that aren't really there. Storms that shed black, acidic rain on the land, and cause the furniture to lift in the air, and for birds to drop dead by the dozen all around him. End of the world kind of shit. Curtis keeps this to himself, and we don't know why until a key scene later in the film when he visits his mother in a nursing home, and we realize she is schizophrenic, and that Curtis believes he may be schizophrenic, too.

This puts a twist on otherwise been there done that material. You see, Curtis doesn't completely buy into his own delusions. He knows there's a large chance that he's going out of his mind, and this scares him, because he wants to be responsible for his family, but he knows he may not be able to be. He is divided, and decides to spend all their equity on building a massive storm shelter in their yard. His wife is furious. The towns people think he's losing it. The delusions he has keep getting more powerful, and they cause him to wet the bed, to bleed from the mouth, to wake screaming in the night. He seeks therapy, but he can't afford to see a shrink, just an inane social worker. He gets into trouble at work, gets in a feud with a coworker. Things get worse.

This is one of those films that hinges on the performance of the main character. Michael Shannon is one of those actors who specializes in showing the whites of his eyes. He played one of the craziest characters I've ever seen in the film Bug, and he was nominated for an Oscar for playing a rational crazy person in Revolutionary Road. Here, we have complete sympathy for him, and it is painful because it's like watching a train wreck. He doesn't have much going for him before he starts seeing things, and it just goes downhill from there.

This is a powerful performance, and it is only hampered by a couple of scenes that I feel weaken the effect of the film. One is an unlikely fight that breaks out at a town hall gathering, and the other is the ending, which feels cheap and tacked on, and goes against my overwhelming belief about what is really happening. If the film had ended with the previous scene, it would have been a lot better off, but still we have the performance by Shannon, which is one helluva thing.